Pray for us....

People tend to forget that as we age and grow older the people around us do too. That means that people that have always been in your life will age along with you and well without sounding completely morbid... you can only live so long. That is something that is somewhat simple to come to terms with. People age and their bodies give out and their spirits move on.

Now why can't it be like that for everyone? where you simply grow old and your body eventually gives out? why do things exist like disease and illness? Why are there these foreign beings that don't discriminate based on age, gender, or race? These beings that invade the body and shut it down? These beings that take people from us too soon or simply in the wrong way.

I know you aren't supposed to question God or your faith but sometimes it is so darn difficult. You wonder why disease chose this person and why at this time, in this way. My husband and I have had to come to terms with this over the course of this year since some of our family members have been affected in this way. Family members that we sometimes took for granted. Family members that we naively thought would be around for such a long long time. We thought this way well because they were here when we were born and have been here since. They have been here to help care for us, worry for us, love us, and support us. They are the family members that we were born into, that God gave us. We assumed that they would always be there, that they would be at birthday and holiday celebrations, family gatherings and parties. We assumed that they would be there to watch us grow and raise our family. We assumed that they would always be a phone call a way. We assumed that there would always be a next time that we would see them.

Well we shouldn't have assumed. Now we are here trying to cope with and understand that we are to live life without these people in our lives. My son is too young to remember them, my future kids will never have the chance to meet them. We can't pick up the phone to call them whenever we want. They will just be a part of a our memory which is not going to be enough. Then there is the whole thing of having to watch the rest of our loved ones deal with the same loss. Each person deals with differently but no matter how different it is always a difficult thing.

I'm not quite sure where I am going with all of this. Obviously I know that death is a part of life. I have a greater faith that there is more to life than the physical time here on earth but that doesn't always make it easier. I just don't want suffering. Physical suffering, emotional suffering, or spiritual suffering. I ask for prayers for our families to heal and to have strength. It is my only comfort that once they pass, their bodies are free...free from the invaders and the pain.